It's All an Act
by Karen and LB
© 2002
Written to fulfill the following challenge:
Write a story using the following lyrics in your story or as the theme of your story.
I want you to brag about me, forget your pride. Be mine completely tonight.
--I Want You, Jessica Riddle
*****
Lance laughs good-naturedly, but if he has to hear one more joke about his movie he's going to scream. Joey takes it in stride, and Lance knows he should too, but he really did put a lot of hard work into that film, and even though he's no actor he did try to make it the best it can be. He's most surprised at JC--sure, they've joked around about Lance's acting on the side lots of times, but lately it seems that JC's been cutting up more than usual. Lance even found one of the promo posters backstage at one of the concerts marked up with a mustache and boogers coming out of his nose. With only a few days before the movie premiere in New York, Lance isn't sure he even wants JC to come.
JC wishes Lance would just CHILL. It's not like they haven't done a million openings, premieres, and record releases, before. And there's that little matter of the live HBO concert in front of half the world. But Lance is so on edge, JC doesn't even know how to talk to him anymore. He's even afraid to talk to him, since Lance seems to bark at him every time he speaks. JC just hopes things will get back to normal after the movie's out.
Lance hangs up the phone and hopes Wendy got everything. They've gone over what they're going to say to the press dozens of times, but Lance wants to be sure. He knows a lot's riding on this; not his film career, but the fate of his production company. If the press and public like this movie, then A Happy Place is good to go. If not, On the Line will be his first and last movie. Ironically, everything IS on the line.
The ringing of the phone startles him out of his trance: his stylist, calling about his outfit for the premiere. He has an appointment for later that day and is about to remind JC, when he decides to just let it go. He doesn't need his boyfriend making fun of his clothes right now.
When JC looks around for Lance later, he's surprised that he's nowhere to be found. It's Joey who finally informs him about the appointment--JC had been writing all day and hadn't even noticed.
Lance returns to the hotel much later, a garment bag slung over his shoulder. He saunters into the suite and heads straight for the closet, without giving JC so much as a glance.
"Hey," JC says, walking up behind Lance. "Can I see?"
"It's just some clothes."
"Cranky boy. Are you hungry? I waited for you."
Lance scowls. "Oh. I'm having dinner with Wendy. We have to go over some last minute things for the party. You can come if you want, but I know that stuff bores you."
"I also haven't hardly seen you in days. What's up with that?"
Shrugging, Lance mumbles, "I was busy with the movie. You know, that little movie."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Nothing. I know you think this whole thing is stupid. I know I'm not an actor-- 'N Sync has always come first. But I like acting--it's fun. No one said you have to like it too." Just then, Lance's phone rings. "Yeah, I'll be right down." He hangs up and grabs his jacket. "I gotta go." Before JC can reply, Lance is out the door.
"Can somebody explain to me what just happened?" JC asks the empty room.
*****
"Lance, yoo hoo! Over here!" Wendy snaps her fingers in Lance's face, snapping bringing him back to the restaurant.
"Huh? Oh, yeah, that sounds great."
"Lance, I could have told you to shave your head and stick your face in the toilet and you would have said great. What's with you tonight?"
"Nothing. I just have a lot on my mind. The movie."
"The movie. That doesn't look like the face of someone who's thinking about a movie. Tell me."
With a heavy sigh, Lance knows he's not going to get out of this. "It's nothing --the guys, they think this movie's a joke. I know they don't really mean it, but that's the way they're acting."
Chewing on her straw, Wendy holds Lance's gaze. "They? Or . . . JC?"
Lance stares, then nods. "I guess I expected more from him."
"Maybe you should talk to him. You might be misinterpreting."
"You should hear the things he says."
"Like what?"
"Just stuff. Every time someone makes a joke about it, JC's laughing along with the rest of them. It was okay the first hundred times."
"Isn't that what guys do?"
"You think I'm being too sensitive?"
"I don't know. But don't you owe it to JC to find out?"
"Maybe you're right. Maybe I have been a little too wrapped up in this. Would you mind if we cut this short?"
*****
As he strides up the hall to their suite, Lance prepares what he's going to say, much in the same way he's been preparing for the premiere. When the door clicks open, he's about to speak, but his heart sinks when he sees the lights are out and JC is fast asleep in bed. Exasperated, he undresses quickly, brushes his teeth, and climbs into bed, his back to JC.
Sometime during the night, JC stirs, and, feeling Lance next to him, rolls over and drapes his arm around his boyfriend's waist.
Lance hasn't slept since he crawled into bed, and when JC's arm falls across him he doesn't move. He wants so badly to return the hug, but right now he's tense about the premiere and about how things have been between them. So he lays there with his eyes open, waiting for morning.
When JC awakens, Lance is already up and in the shower. JC knows it's going to be a very busy, very wearing day for Lance, so, as much as he'd like to demand that Lance tell him what's going on, he decides to just try to stay out of Lance's way as much as possible. And try to smooth the way as much as possible. Accordingly, he opens the bathroom door and calls out "You want me to order breakfast?"
Over the pounding water, Lance calls out, "Yeah, whatever. Thanks."
JC goes to the phone and calls in their order, then waits for Lance to emerge from the steamy bathroom. Lance is towel-drying his hair when he comes out, another towel wrapped around his waist, and he goes straight for the closet to pick out something for the press junket he's doing today. The greeting dies on JC's lips and he goes into the bathroom to shower.
Lance pulls on a pair of baggy pants and a simple shirt before quickly eating the french toast JC ordered for him. Mid-bite, he realizes JC knows him so well that he knew how much Lance likes the french toast in this hotel. He puts down his fork and is about to go back to the bathroom when his phone rings. He sits by the window, facing out. "Hi mom. Yeah, I'm almost ready. The car'll be here at eight, so I'll come by your room around then. No, everything's all right. Okay, everything's not all right. It's JC . . . he's just being so . . . "
JC turns off the water and steps out of the shower. He cracks the door to vent some of the steam and freezes when he hears Lance talking. "...it's like he's not taking this seriously at all. I don't expect him to treat this like it's some major movie, but it's my first film and he's acting like it's a big joke. I know you are, mom. I just thought JC would be proud too."
Stunned, JC retreats to the sink. He just can't believe that Lance doesn't realize how proud he is of him. But if he just goes out there and says something, Lance will think he's just talking. He's got to figure out a way to show him.
Without telling JC he's leaving, Lance heads over to Joey's room to begin the day's interviews. He only wishes JC would be more supportive, because he wants so badly to share this all with the person he's supposed to feel closest too.
JC quickly finishes what he needs to do and steps out of the bathroom. "Hey, Lance, you want me to . . . ?" But he's talking to an empty room again.
*****
The day flies. Lance focuses all his energy on answering the questions fired at him and Joey, and by the time they return to the hotel to change he's feeling more optimistic. Joey has that effect on him. The jokes never seemed to bother him, so Lance decides that if JC is going to persist in mocking his side projects, he'll just ignore it. But he doesn't have a chance, because when he enters their suite he finds it empty. There's a note propped against the mirror. When Lance opens it, he reads, "Lance, I had something REALLY important I had to do. So I'll see you there. Love, Josh."
Really important? What could be more important than attending your boyfriend's first ever movie premiere? Sure, they're not going as a couple, and Lance is taking his mom, but he wanted to walk down the red carpet with JC by his side too. Lance balls up the note and tosses it aside angrily. He can't be pissed tonight, however; he has to put on a happy face for Happy Place so he hurries to the shower. Whatever JC has to do is his business, Lance decides. His mom will be there, his friends will be there--if JC has something better to do before the big night, so be it.
It took a lot of talking and a lot of convincing, but JC finally got his way. And it's already paying off. Several reporters have already approached him for sound bytes. He straightens his jacket, which happens to be one of Lance's favorites, and smiles at the next approaching face.
Diane Bass holds her son's hand as the limo approaches the theater he's booked for the premiere. There's a sizable crowd behind the barricades lining the streets; Lance gazes at the faces as he passes by, so full of expectation. He only hopes he doesn't let them down.
Wendy smiles at him from across the seat and kicks his foot playfully. "Hey, it's gonna be fine. They'll love it."
Diane smiles at Lance's business partner. "They will. It's a wonderful movie, hon." She kisses him lightly on the cheek, then rubs at the pale lipstick stain left behind. Lance smiles back for the first time since they left the hotel, feeling at once very childlike next to his mother and very old--a movie, a couple of hit records, a slew of videos--he has everything he could ever want. Almost. Because without JC by his side, it all feels so meaningless.
The car stops at the end of the long, red carpet, and the door is opened by one of the bodyguards. Lance steps out amid flashbulbs and screaming fans. In the brightness of the camera flashes, he sees the other limo pull up behind and knows that Justin, Britney, Joey, Chris, and their dates will soon step out. But there's still no sign of JC. Lance puts on his performance face and helps his mother out of the car, and as she takes his arm they begin the long ascent up the carpet. Reporters surround them but are coaxed aside by the security team. Before he's halfway to the door of the theater, he stops. He's not sure what he's seeing in the midst of all the lights and noise, but it looks like JC, dressed up like nobody's business in one of Lance's favorite jackets and very tight, very funky pants. But it's not what his bandmate is wearing that catches Lance's eye; it's what he's doing. It looks like . . . it appears to Lance that JC is handing out some sort of flyers. As Lance gets closer, as JC moves down the carpet toward him, interacting with the crowd as he places in each eager hand one of the large, shiny papers, Lance sees that they are not flyers but the promo posters for his movie. JC is handing out posters. Of his movie. For a long moment, Lance stands still, the screams around him, the lights flashing, and hears and sees nothing but his boyfriend.
JC comes up even with Lance as he hands out his last poster. He smiles into his boyfriend's stunned face and simply, almost shyly says "Hey, you."
Keeping his voice low, Lance asks, "JC, w-what are you doing?"
"Just supporting the best movie ever."
"BEST? But you've been making fun of it all week."
People have started looking at them, and Diane puts a gentle pressure on Lance's arm to get them moving again. Wendy steps up next to JC and they all walk together as JC says, "I didn't realize how I was making you feel and when I found out . . . I'm ashamed of myself. But I'm very, very proud of you."
That's all Lance needs to hear. He feels like hugging JC right there, and he does put his arm around him for publicity's sake, but he wants so much more. He wants to pick JC up and swing him around and shout at the top of his lungs. When they enter the theater, Lance is beaming. He can hardly sit still during the screening, but he tries his best to focus, even as his mother gently squeezes his hand and sniffles her way through the end. He keeps glancing over at JC to see his reactions--he never let the other guys see the final cut because he wanted it to be a surprise.
JC is totally caught up in the movie, almost to the point of forgetting that it's Lance he's watching. Except for the occasional pang of jealousy. In the protective dark of the movie theater, he reaches over to squeeze the hand not held by Lance's mom.
Lance gazes down at the hands, joined together in darkness, and smiles. Even though he starred in the movie opposite a girl he hardly knew, the basic theme of the movie holds true to him: that magnetic bond between two people who are truly, undeniably in love. He's so caught up in his own thoughts that when the credits roll and the audience applauds, he has to remind himself where he is.
JC releases Lance's hand to clap enthusiastically. He smiles over at Lance, who's busy blushing and listening to something his mom is saying. He leans over to say, "That was even better than I expected!" to Wendy. Three days later, he'll be amused to see a picture of that moment in the tabloids, along with speculation about a romance between him and Wendy.
The house lights come on, and Lance rises, receiving handshakes and kisses from his friends and other celebrities. The next week, the tabloids would give lukewarm reviews, but Lance won't care. It's this night, and his friends and family, that matters. With the rush to congratulate him, he and JC get separated. It's not until later, at the party, that he's able to finally speak with him. Pulling JC aside, he whispers, "Can I talk to you for a minute?"
"Of course." JC spots two seats in a secluded part of the room and leads Lance over to them.
"I, um, I just wanted to--"
"LANCE! There you are!" Joey stumbles up to the couch and throws himself in Lance's lap. "There's my favorite co-star."
"Joey, get off," Lance says, annoyed, but he can't help laughing at his friend's antics. "Go get yourself another drink."
"That's a VERY good idea. Want anything?"
"No, I'm fine." After Joey leaves, Lance rolls his eyes. He grabs JC's arm and pulls him to his feet. "Come on." He leads JC through a doorway guarded by Lonnie and down a dimly lit hallway to a back room. One advantage to being a celebrity in a club is access to private rooms. When he closes the door behind him, the music and noise from the rest of the club are muffled, allowing Lance to actually hear himself. "Much better."
"Much, much better." JC brushes his hand over Lance's arm. "I love this," he says, indicating the entire outfit. "You look great."
"Thanks. I like the color. And I like what you're wearing."
JC grins. "I knew you would. I tried to think of what you'd want me to wear. Now, what did you want to talk to me about?"
Lance takes JC's hands. "Not clothes. I just wanted to thank you for what you did. I don't really understand why you did it, but it was a big surprise."
"I heard you talking on the phone to your mom, Lance. I didn't mean to, but I did. And when I thought about how I'd been acting, well, I had to do something. To show you, and everyone else, how proud I really am of you."
"Are you? Really? Because I don't care what the critics think--your opinion is what matters."
"Yes, really. I would not have been out there if I wasn't. If I didn't know you so well, I wouldn't believe what you accomplished. Acting AND producing AND finishing an album all at once. And I was stunned watching it. You're amazing."
"Nah, it's a good movie, but I'm no actor. But thanks for saying what you said. I needed to hear that."
JC puts his hands on Lance's shoulders and looks hard into his eyes. "You. Are. Amazing."
Lance smiles down at the floor. "Stop. That's not why I brought you in here."
"I'm gonna keep telling you till you believe me."
"You're my boyfriend. You're supposed to tell me things like that."
"Yeah, well, I haven't been doing it enough lately."
"Yeah, but we've known each other so long, you shouldn't have to say anything."
"Maybe not, but I still want to. And I still mean it."
"Look, that's not what this is about."
"Okay, tell me what it's about."
"It's about this." Lance puts his hands on JC's waist and kisses him deeply.
"See, I told you you were amazing," JC whispers when they at last separate.
"It's you. You inspire me," Lance breathes back.
"Even when I'm being a jerk?"
Laughing, Lance answers, "You're never a jerk."
"You must really love me, then." JC leans in for another kiss. "But, hey, there's a lot of people out there who came to see you."
Lance knows JC is right. He knows he should be out there mingling, shaking hands, giving sound bytes, posing for pictures. He knows that as well as he knows his own name. But right now he doesn't care. There will be time for that later. Right now, he wants one special moment with the man he loves. "They can wait," Lance says, before pressing his lips against JC's again. JC enfolds Lance, drawing him closer as he opens to Lance's kiss, returning it with all his heart. He promises himself that he will never let Lance down again.
Lance can taste the sincerity in JC's kiss, as though it's some tangible flavor. He slowly backs them to the wall, pressing his body against JC, needing to be so close to his lover that nothing can separate them.
Being pinned against the wall makes JC even hungrier for this kiss, somehow. He devours Lance's hot mouth, savoring every second.
Lance thrusts his tongue into JC's welcoming mouth, tasting every surface, every millimeter of the warm, moist cavern.
JC slips his hands up under Lance's jacket, running his fingers over the soft fabric of his shirt, the firm planes of his back. Breaking the kiss, Lance says, breathless, "You know the great thing about this shirt? It doesn't wrinkle."
"Your stylist is very, very smart."
"She knows me too well," Lance growls, before reaching for the buttons of JC's shirt.
"She knows you fool around with your boyfriend in back rooms?"
"She knows I like clothes that can handle a lot of wear and tear," Lance states, as he slowly works open the buttons of JC's silk shirt.
"We'll just have to test them out and you can report back," JC says as he eases Lance's shirt out of the waistband of his pants.
"It feels really good against my skin. But I bet it'll feel even better off."
"Whatever you want," JC purrs as he slips first the jacket then the shirt off. "I know I feel better with your shirt off."
"You feel better with your shirt off," Lance responds, peeling JC's shirt off his shoulders.
"You're right," JC says, crushing Lance to his bare chest, feeling the heat radiating from Lance's skin. "I feel wonderful."
"You taste wonderful." To demonstrate, Lance brings his lips to JC's neck, using his tongue and teeth to tease the skin lightly. His hands slip between their tightly pressed bodies to caress JC's tight chest muscles.
JC lets his head fall back against the wall, giving Lance easier access to his throat. His hands glide down Lance's smoothly muscled back to cup and squeeze his firm, rounded ass.
Lance growls against JC's throat, sending a vibration traveling through his body, as his fingers lightly brush against JC's small, brown nipples, bringing them to tiny peaks.
"Lance," JC whispers into the soft hair. He pulls Lance even more tightly to him, grinding their growing erections together.
Instinctively, Lance begins to move against JC, small movements with his hips while his lips travel to the tight spot where JC's neck meets his shoulder. Quiet sounds escape Lance's throat as he devours that spot, sucking gently and licking hungrily.
It's only been a few days since they've touched like this, but it feels like forever. JC can't be slow, can't be painstaking right now. He's just too eager. His hands release Lance's ass and reach instead for the button and zipper of his pants.
Lance whimpers with need. Just the simple touch of JC's fingers on his zipper drive him wild with desire. Gently squeezing JC's nipples, Lance conveys his arousal wordlessly, lifting his head to capture JC's mouth.
JC rubs his fingers along the length of the zipper a few times, feeling Lance twitch under the touch. As he opens his lips to Lance's questing tongue, he slides the zipper down and reaches inside to stroke the length of Lance's hot hardness through the thin fabric of his boxer briefs.
Lance's tongue seeks out JC's, and the two tangle in a passionate dance. His breath labored, he presses his palms against the wall on either side of JC, pressing his chest against JC's warm skin.
JC eases the tight pants over Lance's hips, then slides down the boxer briefs as well, wrapping his hand around Lance's long shaft.
Lance teases JC's mouth, kissing him again and again, pulling back and then moving in once again, flicking his tongue at the full, moist, sensuous lips.
JC smiles. He can't help it. Lance can just be so playfully sensual that it fills him with delight. He's so aroused now that it's almost painful, and the next time they separate, JC gasps, "I want you."
"You have me," Lance groans, his own overwhelming need becoming increasingly difficult to ignore. He looks around the room frantically, and spotting a small bottle of hand lotion on a side table, holds up his pants with one hand and reaches for the bottle with the other.
"So resourceful," JC murmurs. "That's what you're the famous producer."
"Not so famous. This may be my first and last production." Somehow, Lance manages to say this while unfastening JC's pants and lowering them and his shorts to the floor. He kisses his lover once more--it's a long, passionate kiss-- before turning him toward the wall. As Lance slathers the lotion up and down his stiff member, he plants soft, tender kisses on JC's shoulders, then tosses the lotion aside and wraps his hand around JC's heated erection before pushing himself inside JC's tight, hot passage.
JC is trying very hard to be quiet, given where they are, but he allows himself a groan, muffled against his hand, as Lance pushes into him. He shifts his stance to allow Lance deeper penetration, biting his lip to keep the sound in.
"Are you okay? Am I hurting you?" Lance asks frantically, with genuine concern. He pulls back slightly, but remains inside his lover.
"God, no," JC manages. "You feel incredible."
"It's you, JC. You're incredible," Lance murmurs, returning his lips to JC's back, kissing along his shoulder blades as he pulls him away from the wall, just a few inches. One hand begins a steady, stroking rhythm; the other travels along JC's smooth back, around to his chest, covering every delectable surface of exposed skin. He presses in further, gently yet insistently, needing JC's warmth to surround his pulsing erection.
"So good, baby, so good, " JC whispers as he's filled completely. He reaches up and behind him with one hand to caress Lance's hair, needing to make contact, to touch.
Lance turns his head to kiss the hand, and his lips travel to JC's ear as he grunts hotly in time with each thrust. He strokes JC's erection firmly, using all his concentration to please his boyfriend.
JC pushes back with his hips, meeting each thrust. His hand drops down to clench Lance's ass, pulling him in deeper with each stroke. Lance's hand is demanding on JC's erection and he feels himself getting close.
Lance throws himself against JC, thrusting harder and faster as he approaches climax. He tries to slow down, but he's beyond control. With one deep, penetrating push, he releases himself inside his lover, his lips pressed tightly against JC's neck, his eyes squeeze shut as he convulses against JC's long, lean body.
"Lancccccce," JC hisses, as his orgasm hits him, hard. His supporting arm collapses and he falls, weak-kneed, against the wall.
Gripping JC tightly, Lance holds onto JC, lowering them both to their knees before slipping out and cradling JC against him. He brushes JC's hair away from his face and kisses his cheek. "This is what I needed all day."
"Yeah, I missed you, too. But it went well?"
Laughing, Lance rocks JC. "It went GREAT."
"I meant your day, Dirty Mind Boy."
"Ohhhhh. That. It's kind of hard to focus on that when you're holding your naked boyfriend."
"Well, I don't want you to think I'm only interested in your body."
"You're not? I must be doing something wrong."
"Dork."
"You're calling me a dork? I just made a movie."
"Okay, you're a talented dork."
"That's better. I'll never deny--"
Suddenly, there's a knock at the door. "Lance, you in there?" comes Wendy's muffled voice.
"Uh, yeah. I'll be out in a minute."
"Well, hurry. Everyone's asking about you and I can only stall them for so long. What are you doing, anyway?"
"Nothing. I just needed a minute." And softer, nuzzling JC's neck, "Or two, or three."
JC finds some paper towels and they clean themselves up as best they can, and then quickly dress. Lance straightens JC's shirt and dusts imaginary lint off his shoulder. He just needs to touch him one more time. "Ready?"
JC leans in for one more kiss. "Ready."
"You mean you're not embarrassed to be seen with a bad actor?"
"You're the only one who thinks you're a bad actor. Me? I'm proud of you."
Lance pauses with his hand on the doorknob. "That means a lot to me."
"Get on out there. Your public awaits."
Lance reaches in his pocket and pulls out a pair of tinted glasses. He knows his cheeks are flushed and his hair is mussed, but he doesn't care. He knows that a lot of people out there worked hard on this film. He knows that no matter what the critics say, it will always be a success in his mind. And he knows that as long as JC is by his side, there's nothing he can't do.